Back in February with I was dismissed from my employment even though I handled it well and went back to work for former clients and took on a new one in home care, I was really having a tough time trying to get it “together”.
I like to be active, like to have things to do all the time and down times are rare for me as I am always doing something with my hands.
Since February I was feeling kind of blah, not really wanting to do much of anything. I started studying a new children’s church series and was getting used to writing everything out by hand as I didn’t have the programs or items I needed to present it in the manner I’d been taught while working with Child Evangelism Fellowship.
An event a couple of weeks ago kind of woke me up. My mom was in the hospital and at one night after a family graduation I went back to say good night. Other family members had already gone home.
While there talking with my mom I remembered how I treated those while in the nursing home. My goal was to treat them as as if they were my own family members.
Now someone dear to me was in that postion. At that moment while I was in the room alone with her I woke up from the blah feeling that had been hammering me for months. It was then realized where I was to be from now on.
During “blah” times that God brings us through are not times that He lets us dilly dally either. He does keep us busy with projects that at the time seem useless but when the “blahs” have receded we find that the projects that looked rather out of place fit together in the this picture puzzle God has of our lives.
Since February I’d been a vegetarian/vegan more times then not. (In the last three weeks that lifestyle went out the window, but is slowing coming back).
I learned last week that I’ve been actually working on feeding my soul during the blah times. Learning more of what God wants my soul to be fed to please Him as I am His employee. I had thought I had forgotten that, but I’ve been in His employment as a “Blah Supervisor”for quite awhile. (Hubby has stated when I get more blah then him we are in trouble!)
It sometimes is hard to see if He’s a good God when we see all that is taking place in the world. But He really is a good God. He provides goodness for those who trust in Him. Sometimes we have to go through the blahs to see His goodness.
“I’d rather be a doorkeeper in the house of the my God, then dwell in the tents of the wicked”. Psalm 84:10b is a very good example.
Being in His presence of protection give you insight to what is going on around you. His nature is good as He has wonderful things to give us to enrich us. But as humans we have a human nature and we tend to go for the tents in our blah times because we don’t think we deserve to live in His House and His courts even though as children we have those times to use to grow closer to Him.
Even when David was in the strongholds in 2 kings he felt as if God had deserted him. Instead, God brought to him those that were broken hearted, in debt and it was those that David learned to use as his army to fight Saul. David was in God’s protection and he saw that those who were in dispair had hearts that matched the burden of his own. He knew who he could trust to carry out his orders.
So when you are in the “blahs”, look to see how to use thise time for His glory. Chances are He already started preparing you for your next assignment.